How do you confront your own family for not inviting you or leaving you out of things?

My husband’s family (step-family) has non-included us for several holidays in the past 3+ years. Covid was part of it, but not all. I’ve written of it elsewhere. My FIL, thinking we were included, told me all about Aunt Linda’s coming 80th BD party, but i freaked. Because we haven’t been included for several things, and he keeps talking as if we are coming. I contacted a SIL. She informed me a cousin was sending out invites. No, we never got one.

Knowing how painful past years have been, but i used to be able to turn a blind eye to it, to brush it off. It bothered me. I got past it, somehow, though. I enjoy people watching, so for several years that is what i did. I am finding that people watching folks who ignore me at best, and possibly actively dislike me, is not a fun past time. This year i’m not sure i can just be a lump somewhere. It is a miserable day. I suppose i can ignore everyone and sit in a corner with a book.

Any suggestions on how to get through it? (Thank you in advance.)

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My ILs used to attend, but my MIL isn’t doing well these days and they don’t come anymore. This holiday had been very important to my FIL and my husband. I think it still important to my husband to be there.

This isn’t exactly an answer.

2018 (I’m on the left, behind my husband. We are certainly part of the group, aren’t we!)

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It had always been the tradition to go to an Uncle’s house for a big potluck in the past. After being specifically excluded for two years, we were asked last year (2023). There is no “confront” about it. Their house = their rules, their choices. (I accept this, no problem with that.)

Each year i’ve found it harder and harder. Because of some recent circumstances (longer story), i realized that i can’t imagine inviting any one of those women to go out to lunch with me. Not one. The idea is painful. I can’t think of trying to make conversation with them. I don’t want to talk about myself. The thought of that is really uncomfortable. I can’t think of what to ask them to make conversation. We simply have too many years of me trying to draw them out, only to be rebuffed.

So, my question: How can i possibly manage the Thanksgiving holiday meal with these people? Why am i spending time with them at a holiday when i can’t even imagine a half hour/forty-five minute lunch? (Well, because it means so much to my dearly loved husband.) It is still very important to my husband to have (at least minimal) contact with them.

Hello,hope y'all doin good, i came to Quora to share my strange story , a very weird one , a story when luck smiled at me ,maybe u will enjoy it , let's begin,have fun... A year ago ,I was a real porn addicted(btw I was 18) ,but never had sex before, I don't have a gf I didn't try to find one even ,always thinking to go to find a sex worker but then I just don't , everyday watching different bodies getting fucked and everyday enjoying. One day, I was watching porn, a big ass lady with big boobs ,just after seeing her the image of my female cousin poped in my mind, (let's introduce her : she's 35 years old , very big ass , nice boobs ,not very big but nice,always wearing tight clothes , she's divorced ) and I thought of me fucking her ,I never had sexual desires for her but now I do days went by and when I met her I was so horny ,I couldn't stay with the family cz my penis was clearly erected , I realized this is my first time I get horny for one of my family ,it not illegal in my country.well to make a long story short( if u want details just text me I will tell u 😊),I decided to give her signs that I want to fuck her,finally I decided to have sex and with my cousin , I thought it is the best beggining for me, i started touching her when I came across her in a narrow place , make her feel my hard cock when we hug , I thought it will hard and I will be ashamed but no , I felt nothing and she said nothing , probably she thought it was by mistake,anyways, I decided then to talk with her about sex, waited for her to be alone in a room and talk with her, I confessed everything about me watching porn and addicted..etc,she said it's normal and u are growing up and u must have sex,well at that time I was like whaaat????? Well I didn't control myself and asked her for sex ( horny like I Ve never been before) she said that she will think Abt it ,2 weeka went by then she called me ,telling that she reserved a room in a hotel and we meet tonight ,we met,and bruuhh, sex is great , I mean, I had to find a pirstitue ,what I was waiting for to have such a feeling ????, I will never forget that night, I started kissing her she was kissing hard ,she misses sex so bad , she sucked my dick and swallowed my semen ,I felt I'm in a dream , then when fucked ,her ass was very big and the anus was open ,didn't struggle to get my hard cock inside it , she was obviously missing sex , she was shouting ,fuck me yh fuck me , I go fast after every word until I cum , we did that 3 times , then we went to her pussy , using condoms I fucked her so hard the moans were higher , everything was perfect ,in the end I asked her to lick her body , licked pussy ,ass, boobs,then she sucked my cock until we sleeped ,all I know that she was dirty ,well before even having sex with her I knew she is an open minded woman , and a woman that looks that she donesnt know anything , but she knows everything, but never expected having sex with her ,well she was horny and that helped...but no one of us regretted that sex ever.. We still have sex from time to time ,and I started having sex with sex workers , joining threesomes..etc If u want pics of her text me.

Last Thanksgiving, after being asked not to come the previous 2 years, some things were even more clear to me. I found myself less able to overlook previous snubs. Also, my sister used to live nearby and come. It gave me someone to talk to. Missing her, her unavailability, made it quite a tedious, unpleasant day. I’d sit down, try to start a conversation with a SIL, aunt, or cousin. The person might answer with a word or two, then would get up and walk away, not to return. When i’d offer to help, i’d be told they didn’t need anything. If i brought food, they wouldn’t eat it. I ended up just kind of sitting in a corner. But my sister was usually (not always) there in the past. That made it bearable.